literally had 100 drinks last night.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
