Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
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