i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
