this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
