I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
