Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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