i just made my gag reflex go away.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
