I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Randomize