do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Randomize
