Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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