I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
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