its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
