She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Randomize
