Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Randomize
