I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
