hotel room ftw
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
