i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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