Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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