no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
