i was born a porn star she said
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
