so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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