hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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