I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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