he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
Randomize
