the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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