the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I just gargled with NyQuil
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize