belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
