What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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