she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
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