Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize