Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
