As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
