...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize