i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I fill condoms, not promises.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
