that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize