Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
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