He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
