You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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