hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
My feet surprised me
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