I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
