What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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