Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
