What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
