your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Randomize
