His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
