dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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