sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Semen is not good for contacts.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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