Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
