What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
