Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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