Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
