Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
